I pissed off my ex today (again)

FUCK, THIS WEARS ME OUT!

oh, you want the details?

Well, I have a habit of not trusting people... of assuming they will get details wrong, count change incorrectly, send me in the wrong direction, tell me something when they don't have a clue, say a word when they meant something else, or just flat out be dumb. Part of this is why I am an atheist, as I rarely take things at face value. There are very few people that I trust to be right. In fact, the more time I spend with a person, the more I figure out what types of things they don't screw up and what types of things they might need a little help with. I try my hardest to never just assume that I know best, but I just can't ignore an error that I see. I may be able to restrain from saying or doing anything, but that doesn't stop my brain from focusing on the error and figuring out exactly what is wrong with it.

I think a perfect example of how my method *does* work is when I'm talking with the other programmer about how something should be designed. One of the two of us will present an initial idea. My brain, in attempting to comprehend the idea, winds up punching as many holes in the idea as possible, specifically finding the most obvious flaws. Then, one of the two of us will determine whether the flaw is really there (or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill), and if so, we'll figure out an approach to work around the flaw, or even replace the original idea altogether. All of this occurs in a matter of minutes, possibly at a marker board, and neither of us is offended if the other points out that we are wrong.

Having worked with Hisham for a year and a half, I've also figured out that in many situations, when I don't understand what he's saying, he doesn't either--it's often a vague idea that needs clarification for the both of us. I know where to rely on him, and where not to.

Having lived with Bonnie for about five years, I know her much better than I know Hisham. Unfortunately, I know not to trust her to catch her own mistakes. I'm not entirely certain of the process that goes on inside her brain, but I know that she knows me well enough to know when I've caught a mistake, and it pisses her off, as she knows by the fact that I'm distracted, or perhaps my expression changes. My brain is so distracted by the fact that Las Vegas isn't south of Los Angeles, that I'm suspicious of whether it's six hours out of the way on a trip to the Grand Canyon. As a result, while I'm trying to see the map in my head, I miss the part of the story where she says she would rather just got to Vegas for a weekend than for a day. In the end, it doesn't matter how far out of the way Vegas is, but I've already pissed her off by the fact that I even noticed that she was wrong.

I think in her mind, it's a double-whammy. The first is the fact that something caught my attention above the *story* that she was telling. The second is the fact that I don't trust her to be right or to necessarily know what she's talking about. But how could I ever trust someone to actually think about anything if they believe in something as unsubstantiated as astrology or homeopathic medicine? I have a hard enough time trusting a grocery store that even caries homeopathic products.


For the record, one of many reasons she left me was because of my logical opinions of astrology. When she decided that she believed in it after I told her what I thought of it, she decided to keep it from me. In fact, she kept many of her newfound beliefs from me throughout our entire relationship, as I would undoubtedly ask questions to understand. She always took this as me trying to prove her wrong, so as she moved away from atheism and towards, um, blatant stupidity, our relationship dwindled.

Seriously! There is absolutely no basis for thinking that the position of the moon in the sky relative to the planets and constellations has absolutely any bearing whatsoever on absolutely anything! When we first got together, she believed in homeopathic medicine. When I explained the physics behind why it's impossible, she *claimed* to understand and not believe, but she's always fervently claimed that there is something to be said about the placebo effect (agreed, but there's nothing good to be said about selling a complete sham to people who believe it can cure their cancer).



If you (the reader) hate me now, I completely understand. Just keep in mind I was a wee bit ticked while writing this.